composition process

very up & down day,

spent £200 on a new pair of glasses which i'll see next week, that will be great, my present pair is several years old, in fact i was living in kensal rise back then so it must be... 2 years here, 2 years subletting, 2 - 3 years in stamford hill... 7 years ago?

i remember it well, the man in the opticions let me take potential frames home to show my friends and he let me pay it off over three months,

this spend today scares me a bit, i'm not going to get my filling redone just yet, maybe next pay check...

a word on books, i finished night of the hunter two nights ago, it was lovely, all that stuff in the end of the film about children abiding which comes across heavy handed, in the book it is lovely, really emotional as i went to sleep, (unplugged my phone charger in my sleep, continuation of dream wierdness),

picked up snow by maxence fermine in the morning and finished it in top nosh, went home for the second in the trilogy the black violin which i finished this morning in bed, into the third one now the beekeeper...

snow was lovely and perfect for my post night of the hunter state, but the black violin slightly disappointed, perhaps because i started it so quickly after snow, the beekeeper is longer and i'm reserving judgement untill i finish it, but it's a strange thing because i can't wait to read one of the two i bought on saturday & i'm normally more respectful of books than this, giving them their proper weight and timing...

i plugged in my keyboard and my piano module to my computer tonight and i've been recording versions of the music to love & understanding, met with the director yesterday and played him the music for the first time, positive response thankfully, i don't know.. this process gets me down easily but right now, with all my first versions down, albeit scrappy in places it just takes on a whole new reality and i'm liking it again...

E phoned, i was very far back from the conversation, since i was so down on sunday after she blew me out i'm very cautious about her right now,

parts of tonight felt as bad as sunday, although i'm alright now... phoned josiah & grace to get a lift but it didn't really work, does it ever when you need it to? strange times...

x