Billy Childish is Dead

people come to this blog for the strangest things...

our 5555th visitor was searching the web for the above, the medway based punk influenced billy childish, from somewhere in london, sitemeter tells me it was bromley but i've learnt not to trust it's locations within london...

to my 5555th visitor on the night of the equinox... something kind of cool there...

i'm stuck @ work trawling through the mountain of paperwork i've been putting off, sadly it doesn't look like i'll get through it all tonight as i'm scooting up to W(floopy)shaman & T's for an equinox fire this evening and then it's early to bed so i can rise bright and madly early for the dawn project tomorrow...

so i've got to push on...

a good lesson today but then they almost always are on a wednesday this semester...

and i was playing the piano in the break and i had to keep reminding myself that nothing is wrong... this project to shift my sleep really messes with my emotional state...

strange days...

x

like they used to be

a morning like they used to be...

woke @ 8 but declined to get out of bed... knew that i needed the extra few hours...

the project to shift my sleep cycle forward not helped by late night TV...

got up @ 8 yesterday and to pay for it i was fragile most of the day, fragile in both directions, made a tune out of 2 samples, sinatra & fiona apple, looking back i realise that all the sounds in that 2 minute piece of music come from the two samples, so i think that qualifies it for music concrete...

anyway i found it amazingly uplifting, called it end up like i and uploaded it to mypace and my CM page, (where it's called perverse)...

but it was easy falling off the uplift and parts of yesterday were down low...

change in the weather to do with it, also this cloud i've been under/part of for a week or so now...

some paperwork hanging over me, same old financial worries poking their nose in...

so today to guard against the fragile i stayed in bed just a few more hours, balthazara waking me up with intentful, purring bread making by my head at the correct time...

the audition for the new drummer for T's band called off tonight for lack of space so i should be able to get this paperwork off my back, the hardest bit of it being telling the students week after week that it's not ready yet to give back to them...

and then teaching this afternoon should be lovely, given that i have to tell them the above, it's still a blessed module, music told how i wish to tell it...

also been thinking about the wealth of ideas i got teaching how to read music which was one of the courses that got cut this academic year, maybe offering some kind of course online... paid of not paid...?

ok, breakfast then teaching... x

prog rock out of sorts

strangely out of sorts tonight,

despite having a great day...

i met a new friend today, name of S, he offered me a tamarind while i was sat talking to yimkin after work this afternoon...

bumped into nippy as well and as they both went off to teach their respective classes i chatted awhile with S, sufism, islam, dreams, angels, the new £20 note, creativity and theory...

very nice it was too, hopefully catch up with him again one day,

then i cycled home via manolis's who was also philosophical...

why we can't just accept that we don't know that god exists and leave it at that?

i accept when a woman doesn't love me, i don't wish i was younger or richer i just accept it,

then we can rest...

this u-turn from god to women brought on a huge deja vu for me and also put me in mind of a character in a cortazar novel...

i gave the tamarind S had given me to manolis who stuck two cocktail sticks into it, cut off the end and started trying to grow it in a glass of water...

i still have one more tamarind which is for dinah...

i also did my weekly improvisation this early afternoon, it's rendering now, and immediately afterwards a chord sequence came to me that sounds like it belongs in a progressive rock tune...

i've just played it for about 30 minutes and it's great, it links up (kind of) with some chords i wrote yesterday while jamming with JtJP & D over @ hammersmith...

the creativity continues apace,

but this peculiar out of sorts ness...?

x

hard work

these 2 classes @ hammersmith really do me in... less so last week, somehow because i was hungover things fell into place easier... and this gave me a false sense of things working... today really did my head in, found myself getting annoyed at points in both classes and it's been awhile since that's been going on...

getting angry, but not expressing that anger in a good way,

oh well... over now, my boss is observing the 2nd class next week so it won't be as chaotic...

sorry, just a small moan...

good to express it

x

still vulnerable

having a bleak september sunday...

it's good for music if for nothing else...

i have a lovely melody/chords thing that's come out of today's funk... and i mean funk in the old fashioned james joyce way rather than the james brown way...

i put an old tune up on my mypace... you know you can have 4 tunes up there at any one time? the last week had you can't be mine an old ballad i cowrote with some tinpan alley character (in that i wrote the words to an old jazz standard) that i performed with Hcello back in 2003... and now i've taken a tune called sleep deprivation - all mine - from my album's worth of tunes i was toting about to my friends a few years ago...

i love it, it seems that one of my 4 tunes will be an oldy most of the time... that's the story now anyway...

x